Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down +67

What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

How do you confuse a blonde? £74.56.5 x 4^4^4^5 (7) : [15(68yf4+s)]

thumb_up thumb_down +51

You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?  No Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I man walks into a bar. He got drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

wat do call a joke thats funny a funny joke

thumb_up thumb_down +35

if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +27

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops