what rhymes with sloth? rape

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup? One of them involves the killing of an intelligent animal and the other involves the harvesting of seeds from a non-sentient plant.

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

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Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

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Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

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If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

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Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

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How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

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Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

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how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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Black people are innocent.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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why did the chicken cross the road

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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