Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A dog walked into a bar. He was a trained seeing-eye dog leading a man who had been blind since a tragic industrial accident a year before.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was six afraid of seven It wasnt. numbers are not sentient or tangible and thus are incapable of feeling fear

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do call a large massacre of 1000000 people? a tragedy

thumb_up thumb_down +5

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +5

i dont fisish anythi

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the girl eat a cookie? Because cookies are good.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

******************************************************** Okay, so there were two muffins in the oven. One muffin said, "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!" The other muffin said, "Whoa a talking muffin!" **********************************************************

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make an Indian explode? Push the red button

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops