What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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VITAMIN C!

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops