How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, and they don't have to be blonde, anyone can screw in a light bulb.

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John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

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Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

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Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

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How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Nope, but you know those like little stop motion things with clay figures? Plompsters or something?

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

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How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

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A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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