What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

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Where would Tupac be if he was white? Not the morgue

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

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knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

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What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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Two people are sitting on a 10th story window sill. They both fall off and die.

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What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

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Why did kenny the koala fall out of the tree? becuase kenny was dead. Why did kesha the koala fall out of the tree? because she was hit by kenny while he was falling.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

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Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

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Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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I can't believe they been together for 16 years!! Who? Deez Nutz!

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What's funny? Nick Sotelo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops