You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

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Why did Rachel fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Rachel.

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How is a presidential election like Alien vs. Predator? Whoever wins, we lose.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

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Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

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Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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