What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

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I had a submarine.... once

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what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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How did the three girls get free drinks? Two of them were attractive and out of obligation to "the game" the third girl was also purchased a beverage.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

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So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

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How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Q: Where is the One Piece? A: My girlfriend is wearing it.

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

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Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

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How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops