What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

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Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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What did the little boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's jewish

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

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Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

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A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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