What's long hard and black A drain pipe

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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What is the black stuff between elephants toes? Slow natives

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Golf.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

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whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Whats worse than spilling the milk? Getting raped by the easter bunny.

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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How do you blind an Asian man You stab him six times in each eye socket and drop cyan pepper in his eye wound.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

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Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

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A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

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Knock Knock [Opens Door]

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What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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