What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

Hey

what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

What rhymes with milk...milf

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

Life's like a box of chocolates it's shit if you have diabetes

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

Your mother is average.

Barack Obama.

Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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