THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

Rebecca Black

I went to the doctor and explained to him, "My penis fell off." The doctor gives me an odd look, and then chops his off to make me feel better.

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

PENIS

You wanna hear a touching story? Once a pon a time you died. The end. (all anti jokes posted by me will be adressed with -blarg)

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

dead dibbs

whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

What is cowboy say

An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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