What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

thumb_up thumb_down -6

these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your mom is so fat that when she wears a yellow raincoat outside, people notice a rather large woman who is enjoying the weather and wearing a yellow raincoat.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

thumb_up thumb_down -6

My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What the problem with writing an anti-joke? Trying to not come up with a punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

thumb_up thumb_down -6

q. what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile a. hey robin get in the bat mobile

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops