Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

no

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farm was sold and he had no other place to go.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? The extinction of the human species.

What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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