Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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nolan is gay

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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