What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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How do you drown a blonde? Weigh her down and throw her into a body of water.

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Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

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wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

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Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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nolan is gay

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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