What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

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Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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You cant spell chorus with out... Vagina!

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm allergic to both Now I'm dead

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What do you call a black salesman? A salesman, you racist.

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, and they don't have to be blonde, anyone can screw in a light bulb.

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An American, an Indian and an African walked into a bar. They had a memorable time together.

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

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Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

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Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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Communism hehe xd

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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