how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

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Once a upon of time, cow said chicken go cluck. Years later, mustard was like a ketchup. I said it was good. Oh yea baby. It was a good day.

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what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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I walk into a bar...

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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ert

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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What's the difference between Little Billy and Ice Cream? People like Ice Cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops