What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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hi charles lattuca III

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What's black and white and red all over? An equality parade with a nearby homicide

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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Your mom's so fat... she probably needs to go on some sort of diet to avoid a serious heart condition and inevetible death

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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Rsoes aer rde, voiltes are bule, i have dyslexia. It's not funny.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Your mama is so black, she contributes regularly to the NAACP and the United Negro College Fund. Her donations and volunteer work help greatly.

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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