Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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Abortion

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Q: If a Hungarian boy grows up to be a very successful payroll manager and learns to love and hate, show compassion while firing someone, and how to re-image the entire white house's security system, how many pickles are in the doghouse? A: 17

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

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What is the difference between a mallard with a cold and you? One is a sick duck I forget how this ends, but your mother is a whore.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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Hey Jew. What? Shut up.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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Apple juice.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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roses are grey violets are grey either i am a dog or i am color blind i cant tell im deaf go die in a hole

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A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

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why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops