A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

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Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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Q: You know what's worse than being a mother? A: Almost everything, because being a mother is not a bad thing, in fact, it's a wonderful thing.

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Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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What do you do when a blonde falls up an elevator? Pray, and hope Jesus will take you as well. Just kidding, Jesus isn't real.

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops