You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

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A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

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What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

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Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

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What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

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Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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