What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

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What is the name of the car? What

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What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a butcher's shop. The priest and the minister each by a pound of pork while the rabbi doesn't because one of the 613 Commandments is that a Jew shall not eat any animal with hooves.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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Where do you find a ocean with no water. on a map. thumbs up for great jokes. please

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Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

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What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

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What did the world's greatest bowler say when he got a gutterball? "Spare me the irony!" Get it? It's because he's made of metal.

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ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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