why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

yo momma is soo stupid when anyone says anything she say i don't understand .

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the man drop his razor? he had a seizure.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Did you hear about the monkey in the tree? Oh no wait. It was a lizard.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

someone called someone else a frog

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Its children were just slaughtered.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What bird can lift the most? i do not know, I suggest asking an Ornithologist

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why don't you hit a black guy riding a bike? Because that is dangerous and he could get hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is small, naked and covered in sperm My son

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red, Violets are blue, this is stupid, Violets are purple Violets are purple Oranges are orange Nothin' rhymes with orange wait.... DOORHINGE!!!!! -sincerely, That famous Orange on YouTube

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Sidney was a man, but not just any man... He was a fishmonger.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops