- Anti Joke

What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because having no sense of hearing or vision she is completely incapable of operating any sort of machinery.

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

autsim

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

What fires shots? A gun

Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

Your momma's so old she might die soon.

Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"