Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

Austin. kid with long hair, sat next to paymon who had short hair. "Go cut ur hair." "ok"

Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

Ruller

Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

What did the pauper want for Christmas? Money

a man walked into a bar and said ow

A Jew, an Atheist, and a Muslim walk into a bar. They each drink a bottle, have a conversation, and leave.

When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a man holding a shotgun was chasing him

why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

What's 6 + 9? 15.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

A man walks into a bar and says ow. Two men walk into a bar, which is weird, because the second guy should have seen it coming.

Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

Yo mama is stupid that she has an IQ below 70 and can be classified as mentally retarded.

A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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