When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Did you know, I have a black man in my family tree? He works for a lawn service.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: Why did the Creeper explode? A: Cause you invaded and took his land that was rightfully his. He's not the monster, You are!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

thumb_up thumb_down -26

High enough to know that fucking IQ is a terrible way to measure the total potential of the mind, which is potentially limitless depending on the person`s contact and control over the subconscious state.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Have you ever seen that gay clown in asda.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops