what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You're so fat, that a picture of you fell off the wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Type better antijokes above

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

My kids are mistakes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does a baby sound like being cooked in the microwave. I don't know I was to busy masterbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Rhetorical question.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what has hair? Organisms, or at least most do.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get i the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A Jew walks into a shower. Gased.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is both bold and brash? Fox

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What color is the white cup? It's blue because it has two handles.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why was jimmy's mom crying? A: Because her doctor said their were going to get rid of he cancer, 5 minutes later hey came back in and told her that he had made a mistake and that was for someone else, she was actually only had a month to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops