A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse says "my wife has cancer"

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

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are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

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why was the cat black it was a black cat

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Whats tha difference between blacktop and an airplane wing??? Well, alot. I bet you knew that.

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A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

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What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

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Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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What's your blood type? Red.

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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Two muffins are in the oven, one muffin says "Gosh it's hot in here!", the other muffin says "HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!".

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Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops