Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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