Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

who is not good looking? mon morello

knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

A can walks into a bar...HAHAHAHA JK LOL thats not possible! What was I thinking? Silly me! -David Bruggen

what did mohammed say to Jesus? nothing they lived in completly different time periods

A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

What's purple, blue, red, orange, yellow and green. A rainbow .

Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "NUuhHUhhuUUUuhhhuuuuumph!"

A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

Black people being friendly.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar... They then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, harmony and understanding between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, they truly can coexist, and decide to pursue peace among one another and the rest of society.

Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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