Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Breaydn Simmons walked into a bar

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

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Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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Q: Why didn't the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

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What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

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What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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Thanks superman! Oh this is just what a regular Clark Kent would do... Uh... I mean... Dont worry Superman I know you arent Clark Kent, I just wonder why you work for him all day... Moral: What? What moral? What what?

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

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I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops