Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

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why did amelia earhart get lost? because she was a woman

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What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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