Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

Roses are blue violets are red pull down ur pants and get in my bed :D

Why did the baby cross the road? I don't know but it got hit by a semi during.

I love you very much.

Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

So a seal walks into a club...

What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

whats worse than the holocaust??? finding it in your apple

If life throws you lemons Catch them

Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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