Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

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How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

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Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

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Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

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OMG LOOK I FOUND A MAGIC DECODER RING

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RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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-Whats worse than a joke with no punch line? -What?...

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A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

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whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

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Whats blue, sticky and glows only during the morning? IDK -Lets go Mets

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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JUSTIN BEING SMART

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do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

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Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

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Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

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Kenny G

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So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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What do I do with all the wheelchairs after I boil all the vegetables?

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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what's worse than a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust. Whats worse than the Haulocaust? Two worms in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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