A moose walks into a store, walking up to an employee he says "Where are the potatoes?" The employee replies "Isle 5." The moose thanks the employee and heads off to find Isle 5. Upon reaching isle 5- he finds no potatoes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

Simon says, "I'll give you a five second head start before I mow you down with my AK47."

A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

why did the man die? Because he was robbing a bank and police used lethal weapons By- the duck

Today I went to the grocery store. I purchased milk, eggs, orange juice, and my favorite breakfast cereal for $18.73. I subsequently got into my sedan and drove home.

An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to ge to the same side

What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

What do u do if a blonde throws a bomb at u Trigger the bomb and throw it back

Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

Jesse's mom is so god damn fat that it is an extreme danger just being around her

A dyslexic blind man

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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