A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

Kobe Bryant passing the ball

You tell me. I have amnesia.

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car!

Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

Once upon time the government was corrupt Jk, it always has been

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

Yo momma's so stupid... she scored poorly on on the SAT, failed to get into a good college, worked at a walmart and lived an otherwise mundane life.

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

Q: How many Jews are there in Germany? A: None, they all died in the holocaust

roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

noah is a scrub jungle

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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