Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

joe galasso from plainview ny

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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