Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

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Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? Because they kept saying Bach bach Bach. No. Beethoven was deaf. He couldnt understand what they were saying.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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What happened when the man went to the bar? He got drunk, drove home injuring a young teen mother, brutally assaulted his wife to the point of death. He's in prison serving 3 life sentences.

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

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Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

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How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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