Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

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What is black, can fly and sing? R. Kelly.. "I believe I can fly"

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What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

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So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

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if your in a wheelchair have no hair because of cancer and are being fed through a tube you should wait a couple of years before ending it. and wrinkles into the equation....... BANG

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it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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read this sentence again.

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My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

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Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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Reading the Terms and Conditions

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

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there once was a chicken it was yellow

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Two attractive women were getting ready to visit the gym. On the way there, they stopped at a local sports store to purchase some new shorts, and they got it at a good discount price

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A boy got a dog for his Birthday. The dog would have said happy Birthday but dogs can't speak.

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What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops