In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

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Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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Sir, your wife is dead

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Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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what's funny about cancer. nothing it is a serious life threating disease with no cure.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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Whats the answer to life? im not sure

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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I man was taking a major shiit He forgot to wipe

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Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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Ms Leong Sux

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Nothing. Johnny is Jewish.

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What do you a call a black man in a two piece suit? A respectable citizen, racial profiling is ignorant.

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Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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