-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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What do you call 5,000 black people at the bottom of the ocean? A large quantity of African Americans who drowned to their death in the sea.

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Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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Jay Z: a guy eats a gluten free pickle flavored cupcake, what happened? Will ferell: no one knows what it means! It's provocative!!

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What do you call a lubia chin jew slave? Kia

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Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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what happend when the AntiJoke Crossed the road? It pooped in the ... HIT BY A REFRIGERATOR.

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What did King Tut say when he got scared? How would I know? It was over a thousand years ago.

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I think I am done here friend, it always comes to this, it has always been easier for me to repair whatever is wrong with others and get my kicks out of that, as I know I can and will repair everything wrong with myself, but its hard as hell, I mean I never give up, ever. But that does not change the fact that I am broken, and that simply deciding that I am not, is far from enough, its a choice indeed, but its like deciding to constantly walk trough hell, and sometimes that hell is also called living, that too is always a choice, And believe me, I would never quit, I guess that if this hell I struggle trough has so many nice things in it, it just feels like hell at times. I mean the main motivation behind my ability to help others, has always been searching for answers low and high, and when what I have learned trough life helps others, but barely scratches the surface of the armor I am confined within, I lose hope, do you believe that my desire to help humanity grow, derived from my own incompetence at curing myself?

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So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

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What's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? Getting brutally raped by a giant transvestite donkey witch.

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How can you tell if there is an idiot at a dogfight? When someone pits a Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a moron at a dogfight? When someone BETS on the Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a cheater at a dogfight? When the victory goes to the Chihuahua.

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Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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DAVID.B YOU O ES 2 BAR YA TRAMP

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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Black people are the scum of the earth

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daughter: Mum why do I have a brother mum: He not your real brother dont worry your adopted :) daughter: :'(

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How do you get your clock to stop ticking? Hit it with a sledge hammer.

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what do fish smoke? sea weed

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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Two people are sitting on a 10th story window sill. They both fall off and die.

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What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

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what smells like diarrhea and looks like diarrhea? diarrhea stupid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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