Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

Why are video games fun? To get a mushy brain :P

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

WOMEN'S RIGHTS

So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

Whats worse than black people : a grimy old woman lickin your toes

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

Are you from Jamacia? Because I want to have sex with you.

Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

What do I do with all the wheelchairs after I boil all the vegetables?

Hey, you have small hands.

What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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