Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

thumb_up thumb_down +34

roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

thumb_up thumb_down +28

WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

thumb_up thumb_down +28

a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

NEVER

thumb_up thumb_down +22

-Whats worse than a joke with no punch line? -What?...

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

thumb_up thumb_down +18

AND

thumb_up thumb_down +18

There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops