wanna hear a joke? woman's rights.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

YOUR MOTHER IS SO FAT that she sought a relevant support group. My understanding is that she tried Overeater's Anonymous and lost a few pounds, but it meant more that it improved her sense of self-worth. She's more comfortable with herself as a somewhat overweight woman, and a much happier person now. We're all very proud of her.

What's worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? 1 dead baby in 12 trash cans.

Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

A lion walks into petsmart and asks the cashier were the dog food is. The Cashier replies your a cat and the cat food is in isle 4 you pussy

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

What do you call a bird that can't fly? A dead bird

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What do you call a paralyzed man on a fishing boat? Robert

Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

Your momma's so fat: she now considers her body to be a metaphor for post-industrial excess.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...