What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

Wait what? What if you use the what what? Sorry I am still like super hypnotic trippy, dont worry though, I dont want it to end.

Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

why does osama bin ladens death make me happy? because he was the leader of alkida and created many threats to the u.s. thus the death is ending this creating more freedom. (OSAMA LIKES PENIS!!)

How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

What's worse than walking into your parents room while their have sex? Getting no-scoped by zzirgrizz

Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

What did the follower of Neronism say to the follower of Christianity? Nothing, Neronism doesn't exist. -KyuremCult

how do you kill a man? slowly saw off all their limbs and then jump up and down on the torso and let all the organs fly out

why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

Sigh... I gotta go to night class studies okay?

ROTFL = Reaching out to fellow lossers

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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