Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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What is black and hangs from a white supremacists tree? His kids tire swing.

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Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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What happens when you have nothing to do and you can't think of a joke? You just type whatever you want and hope to god someone likes it.

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find the o 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duh its up top

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why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

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Bob: Say this word that I spell out. Jane: Ok Bob: N.I.N.A. Jane: Um...Nina? Bob: Correct. Now try N.I.N.O. Jane: Nino like el nino Bob: Good. How about N.I.N.E. Jane: Ninny? Bob: Hahaha wrong

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Why did the black man laugh at my joke? k.

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How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

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knock knock whos there? dave dave who ? dave starts to cry because his grandmothers oldtimers has restricted her from remembering her grandson dave.

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pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

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Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

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how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Why did Martha Stewart's skin hurt? My friend has a skin condition :( and is dying, skin cancer is not something to make fun of.

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They see me trollin' They hatin'...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops