Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Have you tried Ethiopian food? -no -well it's really good

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Johns mother asked him were he had been. John simply replied the shop.

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Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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Q: why does batman die in the end of dark night rises? A: he smoked got cancer and died.

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

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How do you get 500 babies into one bathtub? a blender. How do you get them out? NACHOOOS

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

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Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

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Why do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles always smile? Because they enjoy there life even though there both blind.

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Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

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why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

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Bob: Say this word that I spell out. Jane: Ok Bob: N.I.N.A. Jane: Um...Nina? Bob: Correct. Now try N.I.N.O. Jane: Nino like el nino Bob: Good. How about N.I.N.E. Jane: Ninny? Bob: Hahaha wrong

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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What happens when you have nothing to do and you can't think of a joke? You just type whatever you want and hope to god someone likes it.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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