A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Whats worse then hell? The guy who commited suicide would know.

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Jesus walks on water Chuck Norris swims through land

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What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

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What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

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What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

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A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

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Why was the black child found dead in water? He was raped and thrown into a river.

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Know knock Who's there The fat lady off her medicine ball Call 000

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What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

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what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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What black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

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its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

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Why did the submarine crash? Someone opened the window

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

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96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

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Nah Nero, nothing wrong here, I mean I am down to earth, you made me realize that, and sincerely you are my best friend, I mean I hang out with geeks all day, and yeah I might be a bit nerdy or even geeky myself, but not like this, I want to be more like you, spend time with you, not playing dungeon and dragons telling myself I am some warrior princess... I thought playing that crap was gonna get funnier but thats not true the least. What I am trying to say is that I look up to you, what you achieved, and still do, while if you look at me, I am literally several grades below you, so yeah, you are looking down at me. And yeah, I might be falling in love with you to be honest, but I know you have a wife and I am the jealous insecure kind, so I would not want to share you with anyone in fear of losing you if you where my husband, but I dont love you for what I want you to be, I love you for who you are. And yeah I know it must be awkward hearing me type my heart out here, but if you want to know me for who I truly am, as sincere as you are, you deserve it. And no, you are not blunt, you are what people would call "honest to a fault", and I adore that side of you, I mean if I want to hear what people think they want me to hear, I ask anyone else, but you, you are different, you are honest to death, and that makes me feel safe and trust you when you say things, I mean you are a free spirit, if you thought I was ugly you would have told me, and that would have been okay, if it where you actually. So I am sorry if I sound weird or desperate or something, its just whats inside of me right now.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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