Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! That's a rather strange psychological problem I think you should consult a professional psychologist rather than see me.

What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

what is red white and blue? the french flag

Why was the little girl crying? She got raped by a giant scorpion.

Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

Q: What did the doctor say to the man with terminal cancer? A: You have terminal cancer.

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

I have a really funny joke.

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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