a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

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What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

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p

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Why is there air? To blow up basketballs

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

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#IHateHashtags

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ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

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How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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why did the Jew not attend school ? because he was 27

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Why did the personal trainer get fired from the gym? He lacked good customer service skills.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense And it doesn't rhyme either

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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"Why the long face?" The bartender asked. "I was born with a severe cleft palette and a jaw deformity. The surgery lets me eat and drink but my parents couldn't afford the cosmetic part of the surgery, the scarring got worse as I grew older. Can I have a beer please?" I replied.

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what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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