what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

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What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

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Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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Why was the black man out of a job? because he was recently laid off and had not found any job offerings that he would be interested in

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96

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

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Yo mama so fat......Hiroshima.

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knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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What does it mean if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars? You both have five dollars

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You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

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Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

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knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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