What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse replies "my wife died yesterday." the next day the bartender wakes up and realises that it didn't happen and that he is a drunk asshole with no life.

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A deranged serial killer walks into a bar. No one leaves because he looks like a normal guy.

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A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

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How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

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Why did the wheel fall of the car?? Cause you can't fit 10 pancakes inside of a doghouse.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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I'm on the Seafood Diet. I eat seafood to replace fatty red meats, in conjunction with fruit and vegetables.

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Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

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A woman walks into a bar. Guys aren't the only ones walking into bars.

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Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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